Man . . . I need some hearing aids.
My hearing has never been very good. I don't know why, I blame mom and dad of course. I even recall way back in Elementary school having really bad hearing. Every year when we would have our hearing tested, the audiologist would be horrified with my results and immediately jump on the phone with my mom proclaiming my affliction.
Mom would say, "Yeah, I know . . . he doesn't hear all that well".
Well, it starting to get REALLY bad. It affects my everyday life, my work and my social skills.
The other night the Blue Coyote Band was playing a gig in Mancos Colorado at a lovely little dive called "The Columbine". It's been around forever, has a lot of history. It's a very cool place to play. When the band ends a set, typically we mingle with the crowd - most of whom we usually know - and have a beer and get ready for the next set. Well at this particular gig there were a couple of gentlemen sitting at a table enjoying the show and when the set ended, one of the men gestured for me to come to his table. Not that unusual, I figured he probably wanted to compliment us on our music, or just say say hi, it happens all the time.
I head over to his table and reach out my hand, he shakes it and we exchange names. He's one of these men that speaks very quietly, well my hearing the way it is, if there's any background noise at all I can't hear a freaking thing anyway, so I leaned down close to him so I could hear what he was saying . . . .
Before I could react . . .
He grabbed my head . . .
AND STUCK HIS TONGUE IN MY EAR . . .
For the love of Pete; he stuck his TONGUE IN MY EAR?!?!?!?!?!
I was horrified, I recoiled away from him and I'm sure I said something very tactfully about how I was flattered by the attention but he wasn't really my type. I know he got the message, he and his friend got up and left.
So I took the first brave step . . . I went to the Ear, Nose and Throat doctor and said, "Doc, I think I may need a hearing aid". He patted me on the shoulder and said, "come on in, let's take a look". Even though I don't have my hearing aids yet, I already feel better about the whole thing. Now I just have to figure out how to come up with the money . . .
You mean to tell me that it took a man licking your ear to get you to buy hearing aids?? I better go buy glasses NOW before a guy licks me in the eye forcing me to go to the doctor for an eye test.
ReplyDeleteOk, now that im done lauging out loud at Pauls comment, I will address your blog entry Steve. First off.. Thanks and Merry Christmas to you too!.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, back to the hearing issue. Im so sorry that you have a hearing problem but also thankful that in todays world they can help you. As for the guy and his tongue... well, now that is just repulsive to say the least. What kind of a bar was this again? A, umm wha..t..did you say? I'm a bit hard of hearing too but it sounds to me you might have been in the wrong joint this time. :) Did you squeeze some antibacterial in your ear after that? ewwwww- shiver.
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ReplyDeleteWhoooooooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
ReplyDeleteoooh gross.
ReplyDeletei don't know what kind of hearing loss you have but look into digital hearing-aids. i use them and they are wonderful. the price tag, however, is not...when will our government put allow us to put hearing-aids on insurance?! despite the hefty cost, digital hearing-aids are worth it. and it will be much harder for people to stick their tongues in your ear :D
p.s. i found your blog via BitchCakes :)
Welcome Aboard, rowan!
ReplyDeleteI've got my eye on a set of hearing aids. I wore them for a couple hours the other day and they were outstanding. They're Resound X-plore. Digital, open fit, manually adjustable, very nice.
I just have to figure out where I can get $4000 bucks.
Hahahahahahaha
ReplyDeleteSorry about your ears.
OMG! I'm with Paul- I can't believe it took *that* for you to look into hearing aids! What a story!
ReplyDeletePS How hot are you in that photo?! Yowza!
Thanks, Trout.
ReplyDeleteMy current ones are Canta 7 ReSound. They served me very well but the time has come to get them replaced. What does open fit mean? I have not heard that term. Yours is probably the most interesting story I've heard about how you decided to get hearing-aids. Nice.
Hey rowan,
ReplyDeleteOpen fit is designed with the microphone behind the ear and the speaker inside the ear. Open fit allows natural sound to enter the ear canal due to the design of the speaker. It's different from the ear plug or inside the ear type aids that only allow amplified sound into the ear. It sounds much more natural, especially when chewing or speaking.
Very cool.
That does sound cool. I googled them after your explanation. It looks like they are not appropriate for my type of hearing-loss but maybe some day!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with the new hearing-aids. You'll be so glad you bought them.
At least you didn't end up wearing a pirate shirt on national television.
ReplyDelete